missprint

let me put you in the major key


Today's entry is bought to you by the sounds of what many in the meeja have dubbed 'the Norwiegian Kylie.' (If you think about this really hard, you head may explode.)



Besides, the fabulous Annie is nothing like Kylie, she's really more like Sophie Ellis-Bextor left in the Antarctic with a Casio keyboard. If you haven't already heard what was arguably one of the pop anthems of the year, then go forth and seek thee out Chewing Gum. Here's a few reasons why:

- Annie uses the timeless pop metaphor of boys = confectionery (see also: Mandy Moore, Candy) but it's not any old metaphor, it is also a gigantic pop put-down that we have not seen the like of since The Great Daphne & Celeste Diss-O-Rama of 2000.
- Annie is a regular collaborator of the mighty Richard X.
- Me Plus One from her album, Anniemal (do you see what she's done there? Eh?) is a track about that time that Geri Halliwell locked herself in a car because Richard X refused to give her one of his tracks. Sample lyric: "Now this wannabe senorita met a group of likely girls / Traded posters and the voxpops for jetting around the world / But it didn't make her happy and now she flies alone / The wrong pictures in the paper and no-one at home."
- She's from Norway. 'Nuff said.

I've messed up my body clock yet again. I was up until 4am last night writing my dissertation and luckily, my Television & Cultural Change lecture doesn't start until 2pm, so I managed to get near enough a full night's sleep. However, upon being collected by Sarah for our lecture, we decided that our time would be much more profitably spent by going shopping at nearby Gallion's Reach. There's something of the Pirates of the Caribbean about the name isn't there? Unfortunately, it isn't a pirate themed retail park and the only thing it reeks of is the nearby sewage works. You can see why we chose a trip to Gallion's Reach over a lecture on Jamie Oliver can't you?

So, not such a good start after my Easter break but I think that my amazing new Minnie Mouse shoes more than make up for my slacker-dom:



Amongst my other bargainious purchases of the day was a copy of Almost Famous (a contender for All Time Top Five...Coming of Age Movies) which was retailing at a thriftastic £2.89 and also a cut price Easter egg. In fact, I have been merrily scarfing chocolate that is slightly past it's Best Before date (and also, rather disconcertingly, pieces of foil too. It's like an electrical storm in my mouth today) that I can't face dinner.

I was meant to have a draft version of my dissertation ready this week so that my supervisor could read over it. This, however, was a rather optimistic plan and in retrospect, I was somewhat naive to think that my 10 Day Plan of 1000 words a day meant that I could get it done in time. The word count currently stands at 4,500 and I've only managed to discuss a fraction of the texts that I intended to. Le sigh. As you can probably tell gentle readers, I would far rather not think about such trivial matters and instead devote my precious time to the Da Vinci Code Quest! I'm sure it is the same for most girls, but god damn it, I cannot get enough of Tom Hanks with his sex-attacker hair extensions! I was doing quite well on the quest until I got to the second Sudoku symbols quiz and it was at that point that I promptly gave up and devoted an hour to dissecting Take That's Pray video with Megs instead. I rather find the idea of Howard Donald being told to writhe lavciviously in a fountain of oil by a director with artistic pretensions rather amusing. Observe:



I was re-reading my old diary last night and just absolutely cringing at the writing. First off, I have no idea why I abandoned upper-case letters, I did that terrible faux-emo thing of writing all in lower-case letters and squashing words together ("thankyouverymuch"). Plus, it was seemingly light on the content front, observe my entry from the 19th June 2001:

"tum tiddly pom.

i'd like to have simon callow as a tum-tum-tiddly-om-pom-pom kinda uncle, y'know?"


Goodness me, I'm surprised that anybody read it at all. So, apologies to old readers for inflicting that terrible adolescent dribble on you, I hope that reading my old diary didn't burn your eyes right out of your sockets. I guess it's not really that bad, just typical of all the other 17 year-old internet diarists but it's much like when you see pictures of yourself and you think, "what on Earth was I thinking?? Oversized Gap jumpers teamed with a fisherman's hat?!" Anyway, one thing I was reminded of was the sporadic Pop Quizzes that I posed and in tribute to my Diaryland diary and also because there is no-one on MSN to distract me from work, I present to you dear readers, my infamous Pop Quiz...

One // "Ain't no headlights on the road tonight / Ain't nobody here to make it right / 'Cos we couldn't seem to find a way for love to stay / If you had another night to give / I would have another night to live"
Two // "I know a girl from a lonely street / Cold as ice-cream but still as sweet"
Three // "What's my view? / How am I supposed to know? / Write a review / Well, how objective can I be?"
Four // "She's got a boyfriend / He drives me round the bend / 'Cos he's twenty-three / He's in the marines / He'd kill me"
Five // "Baby take me high upon a hillside / High up where the stallion meets the sun"
Six // "Last night Jackie Chan came around / I played pool with him and we hung out / Mr Miyagi and the X-Men called in for a while as well"
Seven // "So much for your highbrow Marxist ways / Just use me up and then you walk away"
Eight // "Running just as fast as we can / Holding onto one another's hands / Trying to get away into the night / And then you put your arms around me and then we tumble to the ground"
Nine // "Nina's in the bathroom / She said, 'time to go now' / But leaving, it ain't easy / I've got to let go"
Ten // "Only when I'm dancing can I feel this free / At night I lock the doors so no-one else can see"

Answers on the proverbial postcard s'il vous plait mon petit fromages. Merci!

3 Responses to “"you've got it all wrong / you think you're chocolate but you're chewing gum"”

  1. # Anonymous Anonymous

    Yay pop quizzes. And yay Tiffany (better than Tommy James, I suggest). I'm sure you having Girls Aloud on your Popworld every week would be fascinating viewing, and you could interview them while doing their exciting hobbies like planespotting and going to real ale festivals and model railways. The Billie and servant girl serious conversation from Dr Who was in 2 or 3 episodes last season, the Dickens, and I think The End of the World and maybe another. It bugged me endlessly but nobody else seemed to notice. I guess Torchwood can't be much stupider than Teen Wolf or whatever last year, tho I'm not sure if they entirely rewrote the last 2 minutes of this episode to fit in with the "story arc". Speaking of which, isn't that Annie the Norwegian Billie? I looked at the first entry of yr diary and it's not that bad, with the sophisticated cultural references (you decided against being a hausfrau, though?); my early diary was just bitching about how I hated work.  

  2. # Anonymous Anonymous

    This could be embarrassing...

    Five // "Baby take me high upon a hillside / High up where the stallion meets the sun"
    Could It Be Magic - Take That

    Seven // "So much for your highbrow Marxist ways / Just use me up and then you walk away"
    Your Woman - White Town

    Ten // "Only when I'm dancing can I feel this free / At night I lock the doors so no-one else can see"
    Into The Groove - Madonna  

  3. # Blogger H

    Spike - I'm impressed, I didn't think anyone would get number seven! (Although I was originally listening to Tyler James's cover version.) It would have been far more embarassing had you gotten number one.  

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